Okay, I want you to watch a short film, around three minutes or so.

A Serial Killer Goes After Cancer.

I watched this short about three months ago, watched it about five times in a row in fact, and bookmarked it.  I knew I wanted to write about it.

But I could not stop crying.

I knew it would take courage to return to this miracle story with the intention of actually being articulate about it.  And I just didn’t have it, I put it on pause and backed away from the center of it in a room with big, light-filled windows of hope, backed into a corner with my back turned, and stayed busy with all the seemingly important issues that cram themselves into my life on a daily basis.

I had to wait until today to wander back in, without a mask of any sort, and sit with an open heart until I could offer myself up, to channel through, to speak about it in my out loud voice.


The Circle Group of Guides that I channel have talked for years about how, contrary to what we may be taught, pain and death are not failures.  That our suffering and struggle in the earth-life isn’t in vain, on the contrary, it moves all of us forward toward Love when we agree to incarnate and do the work that this world requires of us.  Of course, we don’t like pain and confusion and loss.  But we don’t have to like it to stop resisting it.  And when we stop judging it, stop fighting pain and loss,  it transforms us.

That being said, when I watched this clip, I was lost in it for a while, the enormous significance of this journey our civilization has undertaken in its experience of HIV. It is manifested in every single story of anyone who has been affected by HIV/AIDS, and there they all were, crowding in to roost in the little chicken coop of my heart.

Because all that struggle, and suffering, and labor, at the very least saved one little human’s life.  And is potentially able to now save more.  From cancer.  Cancer, the still-whispered name of the asshole of a disease that has smugly taken up residence in too many human bodies, and has us on the run working desperately on all levels, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, trying to heal from it.

(My favorite moment is around 3:06 when one of the lead physicians loses it too.  He gets it).

This is real hope, chickens.

This is the real story about how we are always connected.

And the back story, I would wager to guess, involves a partnership between the Divine and some humans, an inspirational thought chain, the willingness to receive it, and the intuition to keep looking, keep asking, keep summoning the possible.  Without letting judgement and pain and fear stand in the way.

(Insert standing ovation here).