Harry sweet-talking the dog: Daisy, can you tell Ben to shut up?
Ben, appropo of nothing: This message brought to you by the Sand Museum. Studying sand for the past thirty years.
Ben gets into his Stay Puft marshmallow costume. It takes about twenty minutes because he has to change the batteries in the fan pack that keeps it puffed out. He gets into the car and sighs. “I have to go to the bathroom….”.
Ben: Mommy how many pieces of candy can we have?
Susan: How many do you think you should have?
Susan: When I was a kid, I was only allowed two per day.
Ben (walks dramatically over to me, puts his hands on my shoulders, looks deep into my eyes, and says: What did they do to you??